A: All Seven Deadly Sins Committed at the Church Bake Sale

I find it amusing that even self-respecting women who are actively involved in their church commit some of the deadliest sins know to the Catholic Church. Or even more fascinating, how did the church never see the “sinful” competition that always takes place at fund-raisers? It did not surprise me to find that the women, and not the men, were the ones in battle with each other. Since the beginning of history, women have attempted to knock each other down in order to feel more worthy, and this itself is one of the deadliest sins, pride. Connie, being the center of attention at the St. Mary's twice-annual bake sale, basked in the compliments she is given for her cookies, cakes, and brownies. While the obese Betty Wicks (245 lb.) committed the sin of gluttony as she practically inhaled every treat on Connie's table. I appreciate the author's mention of Wicks' gluttony at “most Friday nights at Old Country Buffet”, for it add to the satirical tone of the article. The lusting of 20-year-old Melissa Wyckoff ridiculed the jealousy between Jilly Brandon and her husband Craig Brandon (after he offered her a Rice Krispie treat to welcome her to the church). Jilly's critical tone is so realistic that I couldn't help but laugh at the image of a stuffy conservative woman scorning her husband for befriending Melissa in her scandalous red dress. But it is not only men that committed the sin of lust, women were often caught ogling the handsome Father Mark. This bit of information almost makes the church bake sale seem like a soap opera plot, the aged women lusting for the priest and their husbands skirt-chasing young women? Things seem to meet the standards of your average soap opera, until the author mentions the elimination of the “Guess Your Weight” booth from the fund-raiser, for such crude irony is only ever seen in the real world.